I recently downloaded this book, The Promise, by Robert J Morgan. It is based on

Romans 8: 28

28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

I have started reading this and it struck me how important this verse is to myself in recovery from sexual sin. Like all of you who have become addicted to sexual sin, we know the depths of depravity it can take us to and the despair and hopelessness we live in on a daily basis. Sin, even sexual sin, robs us of the promises of God, of our joy, our assurance of salvation, of our relationship with God. It enslaves us to itself and to satan. We need to know that Romans 8:28 is a pillar of strength, truth, assurance and hope for freedom, for the entire time we are in recovery from this sin as we re-establish our relationship with God and are challenged to be sexually sober in mind and body, avoiding sexual sin, build healthy relationships and develop emotional maturity.

I believe this book, while not focussed specifically on sexual sin, will encourage and strengthen our faith in Jesus and reassure us that what we are going through in recovery will no matter how long He takes us along this journey to freedom, "...work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose."

For those who would prefer to have an electronic book reader to view this on your computer, a free ebook reader can be downloaded here.

Click here for the download of The Promise. I have never been so encouraged about Romans 8: 28.

I pray this book and what Morgan has written under God’s guidance will strengthen and reassure you that in being in recovery from sexual sin “….all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.” Being in recovery from sexual sin is being called to His purpose.

I recently replied to a prayer request from 4givn (Paul2). My first draft mentioned the word God but as I continued typing, I just felt as if we have overused the word God and that His name in English is almost used as a cliché. Then I remembered that there are various names in Hebrew of His Name that reflect His character, Presence and deeds that make up who we know as God. I have a book by Ann Spangler called Praying the Names of God (and another Praying the Names of Jesus). I referred to the former book and chose the Names of God that were appropriate to Paul2’s prayer request. It took me a while (about an hour) to read and compose and compile my reply post but it was so worth it and beneficial. I got a real buzz out doing this!

Another reason I felt discontented with just typing “God” was that I realized, at least for myself, that I needed to have a greater concept or understanding of who God is, especially in relation to recovering from sexual sin. I feel that not knowing who He really is, apart from the word “God” was one reason I have struggled with my relationship with Him and have filled this emotional and heart deficit with sexual sin. Well, doing this study in order to respond to Paul2’s prayer request, revealed to me just how awesome God is and has given me a deeper and greater understanding of Him. The Spirit really ministered to my heart and mind while doing this study. Here is what I posted to Paul2 a day or two later:

“The blessing I got from writing that post to you was that as the various names of God are used in Prayer, we see and experience the various parts of His character and therefore His Person and see how through this, He gives all of Himself to us in such a powerful way! When I read the two books Ann Spangler have written (Praying the Names of God and Praying the Names of Jesus), I well up with so much emotion and love for Him it makes me cry! I am so overwhelmed with who He is and His love for me and all mankind!

If anyone wants to find out more about God and to see how He loves us with such an everlasting Love, study the names of God and Jesus in the Bible and as outlined in these books and you will be blown away and your faith and love for Him can only increase and this just goes to prove that any involvement you have with the Trinity will only have positive and life changing effects and ones that are permanent!”

For those members reading this you can go to the 4givn’s journal and it is the entry dated 06/30/2008 and read how it affected Paul2 and other responses on that page and the one following. I can’t post the link here as this is a public blog.

For everyone else you can access the Praying the Names of God post here. I pray it blesses you as much as it has me. Be open to Him as you read it and receive more of His Names and Character. You won’t look back!!

You can check out the books, Praying the Names of God here, and Praying the Names of Jesus here.

I love you Lord, and I lift my voice
To worship You, oh my soul, rejoice
Take joy my King, in what You hear
Let it be a sweet, sweet sound, in Your ear

After consulting the people, Jehoshaphat appointed men to sing to the Lord and to praise him for the splendor of his holiness as they went out at the head of the army, saying:

       "Give thanks to the LORD,
       for his love endures forever."

As they began to sing and praise, the Lord set ambushes against the men of Ammon and Moab and Mount Seir who were invading Judah, and they were defeated.

2 Chronicles 20:21-22

God fought on behalf of Judah when they worshiped Him. I believe He did the same for me today. He fought my temptation to gratify myself when I worshiped!

Singing in the shower isn't any thing new. The acoustics make it fun. But who would have thought it could be so strategic? God knew!

In the book of Exodus is the story of a captured people enslaved for hundreds of years being delivered and set free.  They wanted in a desert for years.  During those years in a simplistic summarization God cleansed the nation of Israel.  Those who had doubted God slowly died off and a new generation came forth.

This new generation now was ready to take their promised land.  Yet when they cross the river into the land they were hit with a reality—there were people in the land and some of them appeared to be big, strong & mean.  What was this?  Who were these people and why didn’t God remove them?

Recently I was communicating with a sex addict.  He was hopeless.  For years he had struggled to be free from his addiction only to fall back time & time again.  When I suggested a different approach one that included face to face meetings, working the biblical principals in the 12 steps and counseling his response was “sorry, Christians stand by grace not by 12 steps or counseling”.  Sadly, he is desperately misunderstanding grace and the ways of God.

Grace does not mean that we passively sit by and hope God will do something in our lives.  Grace means we understand that no matter what we do we cannot earn anything from God but rather our efforts should only be soaked in humility knowing that we only stand by what Jesus did on the cross.  Our hope for salvation, blessings, freedom, etc…is not on our human efforts but on the goodness of Christ.

However, there are giants in our land.  Giants of unbelief that say we must have sex to be happy.  Orgasm is our pearl of great price.  Our flesh and our society says that sex is a requirement for happiness and fulfillment.  I would say all sex addicts have swallowed that lie.  Even after 20 years of marriage to a woman who really enjoys sex almost as much as I do I still fight back those thoughts that says “Oh, I would be so much more happy if we did in that position or with that toy or with more people or…” and the list is endless each time I’ve entertained those thoughts I stagger away unsatisfied, discontented and disappointed.  Lust is like the grave…never satisfied.

I’m closing in on two years of sobriety this year.  This will be the 2nd time I’ve walked this path of sobriety.  I’m very grateful but I’ll be the first to admit that my efforts, while present, I would credit the grace & mercy of God as the author of my sobriety length.  Grace is a power from God that comes in response to humility.  If a man says “I am going to control how I recover, I refuse to consider counseling, meetings or other forms of support I will only pray & read the Bible, I submit to you that he is about to leave the grace of God for a life of human effort soaked in stubborn pride resulting in white- knuckling misery.

There are giants in our land and we must put forth human effort that is humble in nature if we expect God to cover us with His grace.  When I started this journey of sobriety my flesh cried out in misery for orgasm.  Day by day, minute by minute I had to remind myself that I wasn’t going to die, these raging emotions were just that—emotions that would pass.  I called other men and admitted my feelings, I attended meetings and spoke my desperate story and sat there and listened to theirs.  I walked into a counselor’s office and allowed another human being to dig into the dark recesses of my soul.  All that took effort, time & resources but those steps were not taken because I didn’t feel God was doing His job but rather in obedience to the Word of God.  God calls us to be honest, confessing, repenting and broken before Him as I applied those truths in humility the grace of God began to flow into my life and the result has been ongoing sobriety.

Standing by Grace is not something we do passively but rather something we do in humble obedience.  You cannot stand by grace while holding on to pride and it’s a humble thing to confess to others, attend meetings and face the truth of our past.  There are giants in the land and God will release us if we cooperate in humility.  Trying to control how God will release us from the obsession of lust is the first thing we need to surrender only then will we experience the suffiency of God’s Grace.

- Kelly

Since posting the previous blog, “How Does One Develop A Christian Mind”, I have been reading Joyce Meyer’s book, “Battlefield of the Mind”. It goes hand in hand with the previous blog and so I thought I would talk a little about it.

Personally, I found this a great book. Very informative, written in easy to understand language and in a style that is encouraging and positive. Joyce includes many examples of her own struggle with winning this battle and her wrong thinking and the negative effect it had on her life, family and relationship with God.

The book is broken into three sections and these sections flow into each other. I will list the chapter headings to give you an idea of the structure or this topic

Part 1: The importance of the Mind.

1. The Mind Is The Battlefield
2. A Vital Necessary
3. Don’t Give Up
4. Little by Little
5. Be Positive
6. Mind-Binding Spirits
7. Think About What You Are Thinking About

Meyers here gives an account of how the mind is the battlefield and some practical steps from the Word to deal with this. This was a very positive, enlightening and encouraging section and for me and whetted my appetite and interest for more.

Part 2: Conditions of the Mind

1. When Is My Mind Normal?
2. A Wandering, Wondering Mind
3. A Confused Mind
4. A Doubtful and Unbelieving Mind
5. An Anxious and Worried Mind
6. A Judgemental, Critical and Suspicious Mind
7. A Passive Mind
8. The Mind of Christ

In this section, Meyers describes the various types of minds that are part of our personality and the effects they have on our life, family, relationship with God and also how satan uses our particular mind condition to trap and enslave us into negative destructive thinking and behaviour so as to rob us of our relationship with God and stay defeated and enslaved to him. She also shows how we can use the Word of God to counteract the characteristics of each mind set and have control of our mind, living out His Word and living in His victory.

Part 3: Wilderness Mentalities

1. My future is determined by my past and my present.
2. I don’t want the responsibility
3. I can’t take it if the things are too hard!
4. I can’t help it-I’m just addicted
5. Don’t make me wait-I want it now
6. It’s not my fault!
7. My life is so miserable
8. I don’t deserve God’s blessings
9. Why shouldn’t I be jealous
10. I’m doing it my way
    

Here, Meyers describes how these Wilderness Mentalities or wrong mind sets develop and how we can apply the Word of God to counteract them. This section is based on Colossians 3.2: Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth and on what the Lord revealed to the Israelites in Deuteronomy 1:6 “The LORD our God spoke to us in Horeb, saying: ‘You have dwelt long enough at this mountain.” Seeing it took them 40 years to make an 11 day journey to the Promised Land due to their disobedience, rebellion and selfishness (their wilderness mentality).

I have included the Editorial Reviews from Amazon.com as well:

Editorial Reviews

Product Description
Winning the Battle in your Mind. There's a War Going On And Your Mind Is The Battlefield. If you're one of millions who suffer from worry, doubt, confusion, depression, anger or condemnation, you are experiencing an attack in your mind. Overcoming negative thoughts that come against your mind brings freedom and peace. Find out how to recognize damaging thought patterns and stop them from influencing your life. In this powerful book, best-selling author and conference host, Joyce Meyer, guides you through an honest self-appraisal by sharing the trials, tragedies and ultimate victories of her own marriage, family and ministry- including the truth she learned about what she was thinking and feeling every step of the way. You'll gain insight into how Joyce won the battle in her own mind- and how you can as well. You'll also discover how to: -Find peace and stop brain-storm of mental activity. -See the truth by thinking correctly. -Use spiritual weapons effectively. -Overcome the 10 wilderness mentalities that hold you in harmful circumstances. Don't surrender to misery another day. Find out today what you can do to ensure your victory in the Battlefield of the Mind!

For those of us who are serious about being transformed by the renewing our minds as instructed by Romans 12:2, this book would be a good place to start especially since we are now dealing with being set free from sexual sin and the lust of the mind that goes with it.

I would advise a second reading of this book as there is a lot to digest and reflect on. The Spirit will definitely speak to you and challenge you as you see many parts of yourself, your stinking thinking and behaviour unfold before your eyes! But the good news is that we have the Word of God to feast on and to develop in us the mind of Christ!

Recently, when I used Romans 12: 2 (And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God) in a post to a HC member, I noticed an article in this Bible related to this verse, entitled How Does One Develop A Christian Mind? I read it and felt it was applicable to us who are in recovery and in allowing Christ to restore us.

From reading our posts, and from conversations with many of us, we all want to get a handle on our thought life and how we think now we are aware of and have experienced that that battle for temptation begins in our mind. Many times we want our minds to be transformed just as it is in Romans 12:2, above.

The first opening line of the article How Does One Develop A Christian Mind? states it this way:

"I want to develop a Christian mind, but I don't know how."

Man, can I relate to that!! Many of you, from my journal, IM conversations or by email have said the same to me and I to you.

The author of the article, J. P. Moreland says this is

"....common and understandable...."�

Well, that is a relief!!! We are not alone in this then!!

He goes on to state:

"That we are to develop our minds as Christians is not in doubt. We are admonished to love God with our mind (Matt 22:37), be transformed by its renewal (Rom 12:2), and be prepared to give thoughtful answers to questions about the faith (1 Pet 3:15).

A mature Christian mind has two aspects to it. First, it is a mind that has formed the habit of being focused on God constantly throughout the day. It is a mind preoccupied with God and directed regularly toward to Him in prayer and meditation (Ps 16:8; Is 26:3; Luke 18:1; Rom 12:12; 1 Thess 5:16-18). But how can one do this and still perform one's daily tasks? Fortunately, people can do more than one thing at the same time. While driving or centering one's attention on a task, one can still be aware of God in the boundaries of one's attention. And one can bring God to the center of prayerful focus at various times throughout the day."

Now he had my attention, as this is what I have been trying to do since coming to HC and being serious about being free from this addictive sexual addiction! And it seems the same has been for all of the HC community and even you, a visitor, who may be reading this!

Apart from the verses mentioned above stating we are to have a mind preoccupied with God, one thing I am trying to discipline myself to do is imagine He is with me, next to me, in everything I do, and I mean everything! After all He is Omnipresent! I remind myself of the slogan What Would Jesus Do? from the book, In His Steps by Sheldon. When I think the wrong things, say the wrong things, do the wrong things, it is because I have taken my focus off Him and back onto myself. The Word states for me to do everything for the Glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:31). I can't do this if my focus and motivation is on myself and satisfying my desires and not His.

I also have to bring every thought captive to the Jesus as it says in 2 Corinthians 10:5. It is easier to do this when I include Him in every thing I do, when I am focused on Him in this and doing it for His Glory, when I confess immediately to Him for any impure thoughts and ask Him to help me not to think impurely but to live out Phillipians 4:8 and to see life through His eyes and with His mind by what He has shown me of this from His Word.

Moreland goes on to state how we can focus on God constantly by doing the following:

"...memorise four or five Bible passages that really speak to you. Each passage can be from one to several verses in length. Now, make it a practice to pray these passages to the Lord throughout the day. As you pray through a passage phrase by phrase, use it to pray about things of concern to you. Second, regularly ponder these passages or other scriptural readings, thinking of what they mean, of how you can internalise them, and of how you can promote them to others..."�

To me, this is one way of living out Phillipians 4:8 mentioned above. It is another way of getting to know the Word and to then live it out just as James says in James 1:22:

But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.

Memorising and praying these verses is a very practical way of applying the Word to your life and using the Word as medication to soothe and strengthen our mind and in training it to be in sync with God as this is why He gave us His Word. I can see that this would definitely make me more aware of Him and focusing on Him during the day especially when tempted, or my flesh wants release.

Moreland states that the second aspect of a mature Christian mind is

"...one that sees all of life in light of a Christian world view and is growing in intellectual excellence. A world view is the sum total of all the things one believes, especially in regard to reality, truth, knowledge and value. A Christian world view is a biblically grounded set of beliefs about all of life, from work, recreation, and finances to God, life after death, and morality. One tries to think of all of life in light of the teaching of Holy Scripture and, more specifically, of the Lord Jesus. There is no secular/sacred separation in such a mind."

If I apply this to my struggle with being free from sexual sin and living according to the Bible, this means I need to know what the secular, humanistic world says about sexuality and then to line up with the Word of God. The Word says in Hebrews 4:12

For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.

Moreland also says

"All of life is an occasion for discipleship and worship for a mature Christian mind. Further, an intellectually excellent mind is one that is informed, that makes important distinctions when a less mature mind fails to do so, and that has deeper and deeper insights into issues of importance. To develop such excellence, one must regularly read, listen to tapes, and expose oneself to excellent teaching. One must also be willing to engage others- believers and unbelievers-in conversations about important world view issues. Such regular practice, if combined with a growing ability to listen non defensively, will bring motivation and opportunity for regular growth in intellectual excellence."

There are a vast number of books, CD's, websites, ministries specific to being free from sexual sin and living according to God's standards and His Word. He has raised up men and women who have lived this sinful lifestyle and have been transformed by His Word, Spirit, and His grace, mercy and forgiveness. Higher-Calling.com is one such ministry. On this point, I would encourage every reader to check out the Resource section of this website. There would be at least one book here or link to another ministry that would benefit us and bring us closer to God and to assist us in living free from sexual sin.

If we firstly line up what the secular world says about our sexuality with the Word of God and then have this further supported by the above resources we are developing a mind that is informed, that makes important distinctions as Moreland states and we also develop a discerning mind in all matters where we need to make sure we are living according to His Word and can identify when an attitude, action, thought by ourselves or others does not line up with the Word of God.

To view the entire article by J. P. Moreland, click here

When we are tempted spiritually and give into this, our destination is always sin. One of the strongest types of temptation is sexually. We live in a world of sexual saturation, it is everywhere we go, used by every media.

In the past, I have struggled badly and grew up with no restraint or knowledge about lust or how to handle temptation of any sort, especially the sexual kind. Even after becoming a Christian, there was no encouragement or counsel from my church family or men’s group on how to handle temptation or control my lust generally, let alone in the sexual area. Both went unchecked. However, since surrendering to God my sexual addiction in 2004, I have now found it easier to control as I now have weapons of warfare to employ. Applying the Word to God to my life; being a doer of the word and not a hearer only as outlined in James 1:22, accountability with the certain members of Higher Calling including the Aussie Skype Accountability Group, prayer, diverting my attention away from the source of temptation by doing other activities, using internet filter and accountability software, to name a few.

Now I am progressing and becoming stronger in dealing with the temptation that arises in my mind when I see a trigger. I was also very encouraged when I came across an article on the Blazing Grace website (www.blazinggrace.org ) on this very subject called Winning the War in the Mind. The author, Mike Genung, gives a very good account of this battle and some specific, yet basic tips on dealing with lust and temptation based on what the Bible says and what God will do to assist us.

One of the statements Mike makes is this one that I loved and was to me profound in its simplicity:

When we turn from sexual temptation and seek God, we deny sin the chance to ensnare us. One of hell's strategies is to get us to look at a lust object, even if we're fighting it. Satan's strategy is to sucker us into the ring, but if we don't take the bait he loses.

Would it not have been so beneficial to know this many years ago or for some of us decades ago? I wish! I guess it is some consolation that at least we know this now rather than not at all. This is so simple it is funny: “..if we don’t take the bait he loses….”! I like it. This is obviously for every temptation he throws our way not just in the sexual arena.

For more of what Mike offers, click here to read the entire article. It is well worth it.